Divorce of the parents doesn’t change just the lives of two people but their children too. In fact, they are the ones who are most affected. Most often the divorced parent would be immersed in their own grief and hardly bother to sympathies with the child. This makes the child feel as though they have been distanced from both the parents. Impact of divorce on the child is almost similar to death of one of the parents.
Children tend to believe that they have been the cause of the split and the parent who has left doesn’t love and care for them any more. They get depressed, confused and disoriented.
Effects are serious and for the life
Children of divorced parents find it difficult to concentrate at school, have behavioral issues, have low level of self confidence and self esteem and have difficulty in getting along with their parents. Breaking up of the family unit also destabilizes the child and they have problems even when they get employed and future relationships and marriage.
A study on effect of girls suggests that they have low self esteem, promiscuity and take up to crimes easily. They cannot be bound by long term relationships. Separation of the father affects the girls very much and they think they are responsible for it. They feel there has been lacking in their beauty or affection or smartness which has led to the dad rejecting them.
A study up to 25 years after divorce suggests that initial reaction of the children had been one of feeling lonely, ashamed and frightened at been abandoned. But later many of them took to drugs and alcohol and don’t bother to complete their studies. As a result they have low income levels and have difficulty in sustaining long term relationships.
Each child reacts differently at different levels. Some miss the parents at certain times like holidays, birthdays etc. Some miss them at most times and go to the extremes of depression, sleeplessness, lonely and despondent. They get emotionally affected by change of residence or schools if any and also financial instability due to loss of income of the earning parent.
- Best attempts should be make to bring about fewer changes in the child’s circumstances. If the child lives in a familiar environment, then they would feel more confident and divorce may not affect them as much as it would otherwise.
- These children could be taken to counselors to help them deal with the changed circumstances.
- Even after divorce both parents should keep in touch with the child and work towards the upbringing of the child.