Most parents have a tough time with their kids clinging on to them in the early months. The moment they realise the parent or the caregiver is going out of sight, they begin to howl, scream and crawl and get hold of their leg. This is very natural and nothing unusual about it.
Since the kids are very small and only the person they trust is the primary carer which could be the parent or any other person. When the kids are around eight to ten months, they begin to learn new things. They also begin to understand separation but don’t want to accept it. At this age, they develop a bonding with the person who spends more time with them and feels safe in their hands. At times they don’t even let the other parent handle them.
The kids are too young to understand the concept of time and don’t know the person will leave and come back after a while. So they get very distressed. But this can be overcome within a reasonable amount of time.
Here are few ideas that would help the child get used to others:
- If one of the parents is the main carer, then the other parent should also spend good amount of time with the child. This would help the child take them in to confidence and also realise there are others in the world to take of care them.
- Initially the primary carer should leave the child with another person for a short span of time and slowly increase the time. After a while the child will be used to another carer and wouldn’t mind the primary carer being away for a long while.
- Separation from the child should be done in a positive way like good bye kiss, smile or wave and teach the child to reciprocate as well.
- Getting the children exposed to different surroundings would be helpful to get rid of clingy behaviour. Taking them to public places like park, supermarkets, library or just a walk would is a good idea as they would be engrossed in new things.
- Get the child to mingle with other children. Take them to places like toddler groups, garden where lots of children assemble.
- Sit close to other children and play games with them. It would automatically tempt the child to join in.
If none of these ideas work, then it’s not a cause to worry. Probably the child is still not ready for it. It takes some kids more time to mature than the others.