There are several cases of sibling rivalry which begin from the day the child feels inhibited by the presence of a new member in the family, irrespective of his age. It could begin as early as when you are expecting or even as late as when the baby finally comes home. Every age has its own peculiar way of expressing jealousy in terms of sibling rivalry. For instance if your first child is a toddler he would fail to comprehend where the new comer came from and if he would ever go away or not. This is such a difficult feeling that it doesn’t even spare the teenagers sometimes making them upset for their baby brother or sisters sudden presence. If this agonizing and distressing stage isn’t understood and tackled, it could lead to very serious repercussions like in several cases.
Make sure that the household is prepared to welcome the new born without the slightest confusion or problem. Keep your first born informed about his sibling so that he doesn’t feel left out in any way. Ask him to decorate his room with toys and cute baby posters so that he gets involved like the rest and feels at home.
The first born is equally important, hence have all the elders at home understand and follow the same. While each and every one is admiring the little one, the first born should also be pampered and loved to make him feel a part of the family, unlike in many cases. Have one of the parents attend to his requirements.
Make the grown up kids responsible by asking them to take care of their younger brothers and sisters for instantaneous positive results. When they feed, play and sometimes even put their siblings to sleep, they form a thick bond with each other helping them come close for good.
Never neglect the older ones for any reason and if you think you need to be patient for this, it’s true. You have to juggle the two children, first and the second born, without losing your sense of endurance at all. Listen to him every time he demands your attention for that will make him feel secure irrespective of his age.
If your child is not asking for anything and quietly playing in bed you must spend that time with the elder one so that he doesn’t feel left out one bit. Help him complete his homework like you always did even when the younger one wasn’t born at all so. Giving weight and attention to your elder child will ensure positive results for you wouldn’t let him lose his confidence in you. He would know he hasn’t lost his parents to the new arrival. Instead he will soon begin accepting the little one as a part of the family.
Plan from the beginning of the conception. When you think of having a second or third child, begin showing your kids baby pictures to tell them they were like that once upon a time, so that they know what having a baby at home actually means. Ask them to decorate their sibling’s room with cute teddies and dolls to involve them in bringing their sibling home happily.
Understand their insecurities and don’t be harsh at all. It doesn’t pay to be insensitive parents for that might ruin the situation completely. There are times of indelible distress when children even try hurting the new comer for steeling their parents away from them. In such cases try making them understand very thoughtfully that just like them their sibling’s also a part of the family. They should be taught to love and respect their baby brother or sister from the very beginning to make life easy for all.
Lastly, never give up on your faith and patience. Be good but also sensible parents each time you think prudence is required. Children always take time to learn, but once they know you care for them, they just don’t give into you.